Trippin' - 19th June

Stop 2 - Aggtelek, Hungary

After the beautiful sunshine of the day before, the sudden change to cold drizzle was a bit of a shock. So...on our fist day of our camping road trip we cheated and opted for a wooden hut rather than a tent pitch. To be fair it really was a BIG drop in temperature; we had had weeks of well over 30^oC it went down to about 12^oC.

Our little hut was in Aggtelek, still within Hungary (but only just), a national park with some spectacular caves. Gábor and the kids had gone to some caves in the Buda hills (I missed out because I had been left behind in Szeged for the weekend to study). Lily loved them; Ernest however, was not so keen. So we decided that only Lily and I would take the tour of the caves while Gábor and Ernest did their own thing. There was one small flaw in this plan though; the tour was of course in Hungarian. Normally on these kinds of tours kids might need a little bit of a simplified (or elabourated) explanation from their parents to accompany that of the guide but (even after a year of studying Hungarian) my language skills were not quite up to. In fact I had to use Lily as a translator but she wasn’t able to translate most of it. - Well how many 7 year old do you know that can translate the history of cave exploration and the scientific explanations of the formation of stalagmites and stalactites.

We bought a book but with having a new adventure every day we haven’t had time to give it a proper read. We will.

But anyway, I can’t tell you an awful lot about them. Big caves, fairly impressive, smell kind of musty.

It was on this day that the first signs of the coming disaster arose. The zoom on the digital camera was having “issues”.

Gábor has a post about this day too, with more pictures and video of what him and Ernest got up to when we were in the caves.

Trippin' - June 18th

 Stop 1 - Budapest Pride

Photos courtesy of Marianna Kiss

Since we were spending our last day in Budapest at the Pride March, we invited each of Gábor’s family members if they wanted to join us and take one last opportunity to spend time with the kids before we leave Hungary. Each politely (well…) offered their excuse and passed; “I don’t like crowds”, “Marches remind me of the old communist days”, “I just don’t think it is the right way to go about things”. Each of them however suggested, indirectly (or even directly), that we best not take the children (“I can look after the kids while you go though”). None of them understand that  the main reasons we go is FOR our children.

In Hungary today racist and homophobic sentiment has become as much a feature in small talk as the weather. Support for Hitler, advocating genocide; it all slips of the tongue as easily as “It’s a lovely day for it”. But what I found even worse than people making these kinds of statements was how rare it is that people stand up and speak out against them. Perhaps it is a legacy of Hungary’s history of dictatorial rule, but it seems that when hate and violence is being promoted you either join in or keep you head down so you can live a comfortable life. For us, Gay Pride is one of the best ways of demonstrating to our children that it is not OK just to keep quiet, rather we should stand up and make ourselves heard. But unlike them we will not shout in anger, hate and aggression, but with joy, love and celebration.

Photos courtesy of ontd-political

The idea of SOLIDARITY is important to Gábor and I and we hope that what ever our children grow up to believe in, I want them see the importance of showing solidarity for our fellow humans. 

There are some who claim that LGBT have equal rights and what they ask for is “special right”. Frankly I find this insulting and clearly untrue. Consider my life:

·         I was able to marry the person I loved,

·         I was could start a family without having to justify my decision to any one,

·         I can raise my children without public scrutiny,

·         I have the security of knowing that if anything were to happen to me my children will be taken care of by my partner,

·         I moved country and got my resident permit on “family ties”,

·         I can contemplate increasing my family some day by adopting or fostering.

There are so many more aspects of my life that would be more difficult or impossible, even in Europe, if Gábor had been a woman.

Some than argue that these are not rights, rather they are “privileges”.  I don’t care what you call them “rights” or “privileges”, if they are granted by  the state then in a fair and democratic society they need to be granted to all. So, until they are, then my children (until they are old enough to make the decision for themselves) and I will march right alongside LGBTA at pride marches wherever we happen to be.

But besides lessons about Justice and Solidarity I want to give them the opportunity to learn about themselves. Our society today offers such a narrow definition of “girl” and “boy”, I would argue that, despite the best efforts of feminists, it is even worse than when I was growing up 25 years ago. Participating in Gay Pride is one that I see we can counter this and give my children a broader concept of “girl” and “boy”. There are so may different types of “men” and “women” that hopefully Ernest and Lily will understand that there is nothing they need to conform to they just need to be themselves and that they will be loved and supported by us no matter who they are.

There was a beautiful scene towards the end of the parade. Ernest started playing with and chasing his balloon down the long rainbow silk; so joyful, so oblivious to the looks or judgement from others (including the mass of photographers who also spotted this perfect photo moment).  

This scene (and the pride march in general) epitomises my greatest wishes for my children’s life:

Be Happy. Be Free. Be Colourful.

 Csanádi Márton - Photo Journalist

Click the link for some more spectaculat pictures of the parade.

Skin

Oh how I have missed the sauna; the deep, deep clean feeling, the shedding of every last flake of dead skin. Every pore is unclogged and every single cell feels alive.

...

uke gotta be kidding

Gábor and I like to give our children musical instruments to play with. We have; a roll-up piano, a selection of pipes, whistles and recorders, 2 bodran (proper size and a mini one), another kind of drum that is a bit like a djembe, an ocarina, plenty of maracas (and other rattle type percussion), a triangle, a thunder tube, a güiro and a ukulele.

We have all these instruments around the house, yet the kids hardly ever see me playing any of them, I don't know how to. I used to play the violin (until I was about 11 but quit because my teacher wanted me to sit exams, I just wanted to have fun - at least that's how my anti-authority adult self remembers it, perhaps my mum would tell a different story) and I also played the clarinet but gave it up as teen (when I gave up everything else that actually required some effort (like school for example)).

Gábor has written a few times now about Ernő serenading us on the ukulele, he is surprisingly good and tuneful (both his singing and playing) considering her is only 21 month old. We originally got the ukulele for Lily but she has never been particularly interested in it (occasionally it was incorporated into some dressing up and imaginative play - imagine Lily, in a kimono, draped in beads, strumming the uke while singing Finnish children's songs...magic(these side notes get pretty long and even have their own side notes (I wonder if it is possible for people to follow my thoughts in my writing))) she prefers the piano, so we have allowed Ernő to claim it as his own. That is until now. Now I want a bit of the action.

As part of my teacher’s education, I had to choose to learn either the guitar or the piano. It was a tough choice; guitars are mobile, I can take it to any classroom and beyond – but I had had a go with guitars in my teens without any success. With pianos, you can’t exactly take one with you (most Finnish classrooms are equipped with a piano, but the likelihood of me teaching in Finland is pretty slim) but I have always wanted to play. In the end piano won out but I still wanted to play an instrument that I can whip out and acompany my students' (and my own kids') singing.

Like I said we already have the Uke and the more Ernő became interested the more I played with the idea of learning, partly so that I can teach him to play when he is a bit older.Plus, if I want my kids to grow up enjoying music and inspired to make music, then the have to see us making music and going through the process of learning to make an instrument actually sound good. So it is my parental duty to learn (isn't it?). 

Over the last year I have accidently stumbled across these 2 youtube videos both of which almost brought me to tears and completely sparked my interest in the instrument:

Then I came across this.

In case you can’t tell what it is, it’s a knitted then felted ukulele case, the pattern for which can be found on Knitty. Our uke doesn’t have a case so not only could I learn a fun instrument, I would get to knit it cute accessories for it too. It just gets better and better.

The deciding factor though was this. The editor of Knitty wrote this blog entry with all sorts of links and tips about teaching yourself to play the ukulele. It is like the world is telling me this is it this is my purpose (perhaps that is putting it a bit strongly). It is decided. I will learn the to play. And what better time to learn than on a road trip. Two and a half weeks of hanging out with the family, exploring the world, driving in our Lada, cooking on campfires and playing the uke. What a dream and I would be so fracking (yes, I’m a sci-fi geek) cool.

Then, just a few days after I had made my decision I saw this! It turns out that the uke would make me “cool” – right up there sitting on the band wagon cool. But I will not be deterred. Most of the time I think I am cool and for once in my life mass culture agrees with me

photo challenge

Since digital cameras came onto the scene back in the day, I have become a bit trigger happy when it comes to photos. I have become careless and just snap and snap until I get the shot that I want. I have thousands of photographs but only a handful that I like.


So, to force myself to think about each shot more I have bought myself 1 single 36 exposure, black and white film for my beautiful old camera (which in the last years has been more of an ornament than anything else) which should last for the (aprox) 20 days of the road trip. Less than 2 photos per day.

I am thinking about going fully low-tech and developing them myself in the dark room at uni. It has been almost 10 years since I've been in a darkroom but luckily I have a course in Photography and Developing next semester as part of my Art minor so I will be able to get back into the swing of things

School Choice - Help wanted!

Friday was Lily's last day of 1st Grade...well until she starts 1st grade again in August. Different country. Different system. Different language of instruction.

Before we came to Hungary we had wondered whither she would go to 1^st or 2^nd grade after a year here but (I think) we are (fairly) certain that she will go to first grade. Yes, Lily can read confidently, can interact well, is creative; she has no problem in school - so you may be wondering why she is repeating. Well, most first graders in Finland can read when they start school (and those who don’t learn pretty quickly), are interactive and creative. Children, when allowed to be children, can learn these skills without force or institutionalisation. Lily, after a year in school, is on a par with her non-schooled Finnish peers.

The school-starting-age is, in my opinion, the first area (of many areas) where the Finnish education system gets it right.

The decision we have to make however is – Which school should she go to?

Should we continue our relationship with Waldorf-Steiner education and have her go to Oulu Steiner School OR should we go with Norssi, the university practice school (and more than likely our local/neighbourhood school?

Cast your vote:

I am only joking with the poll but actually I (we) would appreciate thoughts on this from people since many of you have experience of being a student, a practicing teacher or a teacher at one or both of these school, while Gábor and I have fairly limited experience of them. We really should have made this decision a few months ago but have been having such difficulty making a choice. In the very same moment I can think that both are the best choice – The problem is, both are good choices it becomes difficult to say which is the best.

What makes it worse is that almost everything I can think of can be both a plus and a minus and Gábor and I really over analyse things. For example:

Without even considering Pedagogical Philosophies, let’s take something as simple as location. The Steiner school is much further from where we will be living (well about 4km) compared to Norssi, which is about 500m plus it is straight across the road from the Education department  of the university where I will spend my days.

Blue = schools, Red = home, Green = uni

Going to Norssi would mean safe and easy trips to and from school, and she would be living close by to her school friends. Steiner would be much longer journeys and are we as parents brave enough to let her go it alone? It would also mean here friends would  be scattered around the city, creating 2 communities; the school community and the home/neighbourhood community. But then Norssi would have 2 communities too. The (all powerful) teacher is normally from outside the local community and  I don’t think parents become part of the school community in Norssi to the same extent as in Steiner. Perhaps even the trip to school is a good thing; it gives Lily the chance to be responsible which would be denied from her if she were to remain in the security of Syynimaa. It wouldn’t exactly be a dangerous trip, it is cycle path the whole way with only one road (with traffic lights) to cross plus a little bit of exercise is an excellent way to prepare your mind and body for learning. But ...what about those mornings in February when it is -30 degrees, perhaps it is a bit cruel for her to have to cycle in that, maybe closer is better...

You see this is how back and forward we go with “location” so imagine what we are like when it comes to pedagogy.

Any comment/suggestions/recommendations are welcome (just try not to confuse me even more).